The Invisible Hand Exists Collectively
A catalogue of words, mostly mine, some not.
Every day I uncover something new.
Every day I've been 'coming to terms' with things.
I'm going to start to loathe that phrase soon.
I feel like I've been keeping myself from a part of my womanhood.
Whatever that means.
I've been opening up.
Through art, finding unsuspecting beauty through photography, constructing abstract images still foreign to the front lines of my waking consciousness.
Of all writings I love only that which is written with blood. Write with blood: and you will discover that blood is spirit.
It is not an easy thing to understand unfamiliar blood: I hate the reading idler.
He who knows the reader, does nothing further for the reader. Another century of readers - and spirit itself will stink.
That everyone can learn to read will ruin in the long run not only writing, but thinking too.
Once spirit was God, then it became man, and now it is even becoming mob.
OK BITCHES. I'm back and with force. The ultimate doom of the gnomes...salt. Sucked them dry, they now look like oily potato chips, very unappealing and bad for one's health. But the now the salty chip gnomes huddle in a bag waiting to be eaten by some unsuspecting victim, or so I would think. Updates will come shortly given my lack of time. But.. here are ideas for what is in store
I just saw the saddest guy in the world… overweight, holding his small penis in bed asleep. Keyboard next to his balls. He looked like he had man boobs but I think it was just stomach fat. Not even funny, just put my face into a flabberghasted frown with a bit of anguish.
I stood there waiting, frozen in the semi-frozen food isle. Semi-skimmed or whole? I really didn't care. What am I waiting for? Probably something. I hope something, or else I could be in just the wrong place. Excuse me, pardon me, I'm just in the way. "It's not my fault that they ran out of soy milk, I'm a paying cusomter damnit!" It's going to be ok. It was worth the wait. I like doing weird things like standing in the middle of grocery stores for extended periods of time.
What do people want? Happiness? Health? Family? Security? What about the spaces in between? Is it mostly to get the means to live and then wasting away in front of the T.V. to forget about it all?
Today I felt how an orgasm is like a supernova. Inside reactions are taking place. Things are heating up and pressure builds on the inside. When a balance of forces can no longer be sustained, the core contracts and then releases energy in a big burst.
After the initial burst there is then an afterglow. The core is no longer fusing energy.
Unlike a dead star the human regenerates and rebuilds so that one is able to burst and die again. It's reliving a cosmic wonder on a human scale.
To be aware of a very possible mass extinction of the human species brought on by the human species makes me sick to my stomach. Going down, down, killing ourselves because we are controlled by money and false power. False power destroys us. I stare into the world as though it were my last viewing. My only reason to live is for the beauty in all. Beauty in destruction? Perhaps so, but it should not be so unconscious as it is. Unconscious destruction for the sake of ego preservation is not beauty.
After days of eating lunches in solitude at the newly discovered Fresh Choice in Capitola and (partly) working on my thesis, I took an opportunity to hang out with a couple of my dearest friends (while still working on my thesis). In this time I was able to see more fully my condition. “Plots, plots, plots, plots, what the fuck does it all mean? Nothing, really. What? The fuck I care! Shut up please (with a smile). Damn, I'm not violent, but I have the urge to smash your head against a window and watch the glass shatter. I don't want to hurt you, but I can still imagine it can't I?
What the heck is happening? Oh, not much. Shit though, look at the mouse over there, what a stinker. He has it good.
What does it mean when I like someone and am attracted to them?
I would like to explore further, to open myself to a uniqueness never experienced before, to learn from their being.
That's about it.
A partner who strives till Death, who lives with a passion and calmness of pushing themselves to the limit. Someone who recognizes that the Map is not the Territory. Someone who won’t let Death take them easily.
And to think that what I fear the most would be to find out that I'm not as crazy as I'd hoped...
Be open to talk about things comfortable and uncomfortable
Laugh much about the absurdities of life
Wonder much about the mysteries of life
Explore your sexuality to the fullest
Don't be afraid to 'not agree' with the other
Explore and fulfil your individual passions
Be aware that the 'honeymoon' period may end
Be aware that a 'profoundly deep and everlasting connection' may begin
Everyone has their own agenda even when it comes from the heart. STOP LISTENING TO EVERYONE AND LOOK INSIDE. To the source, the light, the force that moves the Universe.
[although revisiting this 10 years so or after I have written this I would add that you should also constantly question yourself as well or else you'll end up delusional and think you're Jesus or that you're in contact with multidimensional aliens]
The mirror has not yet been shattered. Foggy now that my own breath has been cast upon it. Tainted as it has always been. I live with it and gladly abide. Next level.
>>>>HI<<<<
The tide pulled me under and I was forced to live with some underwater moss gnomes. Now they have finally let me go. I came out realizing that my webpage needs to be updated badly. But for now all I have done is a picture page with some pictures from England. enjoy.
Dear Readers,
It takes great effort before it becomes effortless.
The trick is to do everything with great intent and focus.
THE BRAIN IS THE KEY TO ITSELF
One of the hardest actions of a strong person can be to let go. Weak people hold on to what is no longer necessary.
If approached with a closed-mind, all is worthless.
Don't get caught up in illustrated illusions.
See for what is, not for what self wants to be.
And finally prepare to step inside, so...
Clear the mind of itself.
Magnificently crafted stone in the honour of justice.
On a godly plane with intricate detail and grandeur delight.
Now I must obey the law and depart due to the facts presented to me.
I obey because I should of known what I was getting into.
Bye, bye, birdie.
The backdoor men live underground
lives not tied to any wives and fucking the hives.
He had the night of his life. She fucked him so hard that it was extremely hard for him not to cum right away, but she didn’t mind. That’s exactly what she wanted. She took pleasure in being able to invoke such godly sensations in someone she had just met, it raised her self-esteem and of course, she had self-image issues. She used every one-night stand as a therapy session that was usually short-lived. She never really gave herself the chance to recover from the break-up of her seven-year relationship, the only relationship she’d ever had.
If I was on an island with every commodity at my disposal, what would my role in the community be? Point, work, build? To what end? No. Live, enjoy, create. Where do I see myself in this community of fellows? On a hill overlooking it all.
How does one make it in the world as a modern day shaman? Where do I go? Refuge. Retreat -> Emerge …to build the light. Each one holds the light. Giving… passing the torch… I need a flame to pass.
What are my fears? What are my insecurities? Why do I feel these things? With emotional detachment they all seem kind of silly.
Do I give up?
Hell no.
I don't believe in anything. I don't believe that God exists, I don't even believe that God doesn't exist. What's the point of talking of belief (or lack of belief) in something that you can't prove exists? I'll just keep myself out of that resolveless conversation.
I just want to live a life based on compassion, empathy, contemplation, and openess. What else do you need to lead a fullfilling life?
We weren't aware that we didn't exist before we lived, so what does it matter that we won't be aware of our own self when we die?
Is there no relief in life?
Vice emerges in search of relief.
Necessities taken beyond necessity.
Attachment to a vice takes the focus away from oneself naked.
modern architecture is so boring
straight lines with its stale simplicity
gimme some of that old school stlye
with its lucious curves, rich colors, and intricate detail
In a little place past Piccadilly lies a Red Lion with golden jewelled walls created with elegant reflections, outpouring with streams of Amber.
There still lies the skeleton of once was.
Only gloss puts on a new skin to revitalise the landscape.
Oxford Circus detour:
A degenerate new beginning with no sense of soil breeds high fashion and discontented protestors.
Brief: See if you can write about food in a way that makes the reader want to eat. It's important as writers to be able to invoke passion for the subject.
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By GLENN RUFFENACH Are your adult children bringing their money problems to you? Some "tough love" might be in order. |